From Tyler Berenson, Schoolmate
Dear Rabbi Lapidus,
The day I found out Avi had passed away, I wrote this in my livejournal. I read it in school on that Friday...
My Davenning Buddy...
I have a specified seat that I sit in 99% of the time every morning for school, in the morning, during davenning. Since freshman year, I've sat in the exact same row, in basically the same place. I started off on the far right, and I've been drifting about a person and a half's length to the left each year...
I never even noticed that until I started writing this... And I probably only noticed because I know the reason WHY I drifted.
A freshmen entered into our school, and sat at the far left of this row. He and I sat together, about a person's width apart, every single day in the morning...unless some old guy from the shul stole one of our spots.
He and I used the same siddur...
And now he's gone.
He was always there, looking over me during davenning. I'm a horrible davvener. Half the time I barely know where we are during the service. My freshman year I didn't even know HOW to davven. They don't really teach it at my school, because they assume you already learned it previously (which is a fair assessment.) I learned Shemoneh Esrei because Mr. Ra'anan would make me read it aloud a lot...but that's like all that was taught to me... So, I barely knew squat. I picked some of it up, and found myself content with barichu, shema, and shmoneh esrei... That was, until this year. Thank God we don't grade strife in HHNE...but the freshmen don't know that at first. A few days into school, Avi, a freshman with the chutzpa to speak up to a junior with words that could easily be misconstrued as condescending, said to me: "Hey, did you forget yishtabach?"...it wasn't condescending. It was Avi making sure I didn't overlook anything in my davenning.
A couple days later...: "Hey, did you say brachos at home?"...
I figured I'd say even more... I started saying Birkat HaTorah... and Avi commented: "Hey, you know you should say that standing?" with his Avi smile, that basically said: "Hey, you're silly"
Another time... the ark was openned, and I was all: "Vayehiii beeensoah ha'aron..." and when I finished, Avi was all: "Hey, I think you forgot Kail erech alpayim"... I didn't know what he was saying... so he was like: "Kail...you know... like not..." he made a slight hand motion, silenting not-uttering G-d's name and then said"...kail".
Before then I never even realized there was another paragraph there.
Honestly, without my friend, I'd still be lost in space during davenning. We even used the same siddur... the interlinear translation from artscroll. I felt so buff when I told Avi what page Hallel was on.
Avi was a friend and a mentor to me. Even when he was annoyed he'd carry along with a smile. And he made a conscious effort to work on himself... that's something most people don't give two seconds of their time.
I thank God for my drifting over to the left.
I thank God for having known and learned under Avi Lapidus.
The day I found out Avi had passed away, I wrote this in my livejournal. I read it in school on that Friday...
My Davenning Buddy...
I have a specified seat that I sit in 99% of the time every morning for school, in the morning, during davenning. Since freshman year, I've sat in the exact same row, in basically the same place. I started off on the far right, and I've been drifting about a person and a half's length to the left each year...
I never even noticed that until I started writing this... And I probably only noticed because I know the reason WHY I drifted.
A freshmen entered into our school, and sat at the far left of this row. He and I sat together, about a person's width apart, every single day in the morning...unless some old guy from the shul stole one of our spots.
He and I used the same siddur...
And now he's gone.
He was always there, looking over me during davenning. I'm a horrible davvener. Half the time I barely know where we are during the service. My freshman year I didn't even know HOW to davven. They don't really teach it at my school, because they assume you already learned it previously (which is a fair assessment.) I learned Shemoneh Esrei because Mr. Ra'anan would make me read it aloud a lot...but that's like all that was taught to me... So, I barely knew squat. I picked some of it up, and found myself content with barichu, shema, and shmoneh esrei... That was, until this year. Thank God we don't grade strife in HHNE...but the freshmen don't know that at first. A few days into school, Avi, a freshman with the chutzpa to speak up to a junior with words that could easily be misconstrued as condescending, said to me: "Hey, did you forget yishtabach?"...it wasn't condescending. It was Avi making sure I didn't overlook anything in my davenning.
A couple days later...: "Hey, did you say brachos at home?"...
I figured I'd say even more... I started saying Birkat HaTorah... and Avi commented: "Hey, you know you should say that standing?" with his Avi smile, that basically said: "Hey, you're silly"
Another time... the ark was openned, and I was all: "Vayehiii beeensoah ha'aron..." and when I finished, Avi was all: "Hey, I think you forgot Kail erech alpayim"... I didn't know what he was saying... so he was like: "Kail...you know... like not..." he made a slight hand motion, silenting not-uttering G-d's name and then said"...kail".
Before then I never even realized there was another paragraph there.
Honestly, without my friend, I'd still be lost in space during davenning. We even used the same siddur... the interlinear translation from artscroll. I felt so buff when I told Avi what page Hallel was on.
Avi was a friend and a mentor to me. Even when he was annoyed he'd carry along with a smile. And he made a conscious effort to work on himself... that's something most people don't give two seconds of their time.
I thank God for my drifting over to the left.
I thank God for having known and learned under Avi Lapidus.
posted by Jay Lapidus at 2:45 AM
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