The Graduation

Susie and I just got back from the HHNE graduation over an hour ago.

I was determined not to "rain on the parade" — literally as well as figuratively — so as not to draw too much attention away from the joys of the students and their parents. I knew that Avi would have his time.

But as soon as the graduates began their processional, dressed in their maroon graduation gowns, I shed a few tears and held back the rest. I saw how tall the students got as I imagined how Avi would have fit in.

Avi's name was mentioned on no fewer than three occasions. The first was in classmate Alex Gershman's remarks, who recalled how the class had pulled together after Avi's death to support us.

The second was the presentation of the Avi Lapidus Memorial Scholarship. This year, there was nobody involved with computer technology, so the award was given to recognize active participation in tefillot – prayer – through leading services at synagogue and at school. More than one student was deserving. The winner was Avi's old friend from all the way back in elementary school at Solomon Schechter, Ben Perlsweig.

The third was the dedication of the HHNE Yearbook to Avi. Shoshana Taube and her co-editors remembered Avi's kindness, his dedication to the mitzvot, and his eagerness to help others in Jewish observance.

I wanted to greet and thank each of the graduates quietly without a mass of people after the recessional, so I hurried out to the lobby. It was nice to talk to each classmate individually.

Frankly, I don't know whether Avi in fact would have graduated HHNE. He had thought of going to a yeshiva, where he would also have had more space for his advanced computer studies, without parents and teachers bugging him about homework!

But in the end, Avi died believing that he was at class at HHNE.