Makom Kavu'a

That's the Hebrew for "fixed place," i.e., "regular seat" at the synagogue. As a frequent attendee, Avi had a makom kavu'a right next to mine towards the front of the sanctuary. Rabbi William Cohen, the rabbi emeritus, sits on our side, above on the bimah.

Avi's meriting through his weekly attendance a makom kavu'a makes his absence especially difficult for the regular worshippers, who recall how he used to enter with a smile and shake hands with Rabbi Cohen and with those of the senior members.

A tallis ("prayer shawl") now drapes Avi's seat. Nobody will sit there for the year. During the sheloshim, I moved my seat to the rear of the sanctuary. On the Shabbat during shiva, I had doubted that I would ever be able to move back after sheloshim, but move back I did, albeit one seat removed. I don't know when I'll be ready to return to my own makom kavu'a - it's just too hard now.